哈佛毕業生写书讲述他的哈佛噩梦生活

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    HistenureatHarvardisthestuffofnightmKester,whograduatedin2008,admitsthat2008年毕业的凯斯特承认，他是勉强从这所“世界最著名高等学府”毕业的。KesterwroteahumorcolumnforTheCrimson凯斯特曾为哈佛校报《绯红》撰写过一个搞笑栏目，毕业后还为CollegeH"EveryoneseemedmoreaccomplishedthanmKester'slackofconfidencewasjustified凯斯特缺乏自信也在情理之中，哈佛大学里人才济济，Facebook的创始人Someofthefactsinthebookareskewedandn书中一些事实有些出入，人物名字也做了改动，但凯斯特向读者保证，自传中最疯"Itellmyparentsitdidn'tactuallyhappe



Eric Kester experienced the Harvard no one talks about.
埃里克-凱斯特从没向別人提起過他所经历的别样哈佛生活。



His tenure at Harvard is the stuff of nightmares. He survived a brush with a cheating ring, being locked out of his dorm on the first day of school in just his boxers, and being the only one of his friends to move home jobless after graduation.
他的哈佛学习经历如同噩梦一般。考试时险些作弊，入学第一天僅穿一條四角短裤把自己锁在宿舍外，毕业后朋友都找到了工作而自己卻待業在家。
Kester, who graduated in 2008, admits that he barely survived "the world's most famous university," and he recaps it all in his recently released tell-all memoir, "That Book About Harvard."
2008年畢业的凯斯特承认，他是勉強从这所“世界最著名高等學府”毕业的。在他近期發表的自傳体回忆录《有关哈佛的那本书》中，又全盘重述了那段经历。
Kester wrote a humor column for The Crimson, Harvard's student newspaper, and wrote for CollegeHumor.com after graduating. Once a publisher read about his mishaps at Harvard, Kester was encouraged to write a book.
凯斯特曾为哈佛校报《绯红》撰写过一个搞笑栏目，毕业后还为CollegeHumor.com网站投稿。一个出版商偶爾读到关于他在哈佛的悲惨经历，就鼓励他写作出書。
"Everyone seemed more accomplished than me, better than me," Kester said. "That's a lot of the same anxiety at any college, but it's really intensified there at Harvard."
“大家看起来都比我成功，比我優秀，” 凯斯特说，“任何大学的很多學生都存在這样的焦虑，可實际上哈佛学生的感觉来得更强烈。”
Kester's lack of confidence was justified: At Harvard, he was surrounded by brilliant minds, including Mark Zuckerberg, who was one of his classmates. Kester also joked (well, actually he was serious) that everyone at Harvard was valedictorian of their high school class.
凯斯特缺乏自信也在情理之中，哈佛大学里人才济濟，Facebook的创始人馬克-扎克伯格就曾经是他的同學。凯斯特還开玩笑說（其實他是认真的）：哈佛学生都曾代表他们的高中班級致过告別辞。
Some of the facts in the book are skewed and names changed. But Kester assures readers that the craziest stuff in his memoir—the events that seem impossible, like being caught in his underwear and experiencing party mishaps—actually did happen.
书中一些事实有些出入，人物名字也做了改動，但凱斯特向读者保證，自传中最疯狂的事情——貌似不可能發生的那些事情的确發生了，例如仅穿著内褲在众目睽睽下亮相，以及晚會遭遇悲慘命运等。
"I tell my parents it didn't actually happen though," Kester said. "It makes them feel better."
凯斯特说：“我告诉父母这些故事是虚构的，才使他们感觉好一点。”

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Kester couldn't catch a break from the start. On his first day at school, freshman move-in day, he locked himself out of his dorm room. He was wearing just his boxers. To get the spare key to his room, Kester had to walk across Harvard Yard, which was filled with hundreds of students and parents, in just his underwear.
霉运从一开始就缠上了凯斯特。入学第一天也就是就是新生入学日，他把自己鎖在宿舍门外，当时只穿一條内裤。如此装束的凯斯特必须穿过聚集着上千名学生和家長的哈佛校园，才能拿到備用钥匙。
"All these classmates I wanted to impress essentially just saw me do a walk of shame," Kester said. "It made every interaction after that much more anxiety ridden."
“基本上所有我的同学都目睹了这令人難堪的一幕，我本来想给他们留下好印象的。”凯斯特说，“这使我在以后的同学交往中更加忧心忡忡。”
Kester continued to struggle with academics and what he wanted to major in. The pressure of Harvard's culture started to push him in the wrong direction.
凯斯特的学术和专業道路同样坎坷不平。來自哈佛文化的壓力开始把他推向错误的方向。
Calculus quickly became the biggest challenge for Kester, who originally was a business major, but then switched to anthropology.
凯斯特最初主修商科，微积分很快成為最令他头痛的科目，然后他转修人类学。
Cue the cheating club. Classmates knew Kester was struggling in classes and looking for an easy way to succeed. He had a class with someone in a cheating ring, who introduced him to the seedy world of cheaters at one of the world's most prestigious universities. "It kind of found me," he said.
作弊俱乐部注意到他。同学们都知道凯斯特在学习上焦头爛额，而且正在尋找成功的捷径。他和某作弊俱乐部的一位成员同时上过课，这位同学把他帶入世界上最负盛名的高等學府之一哈佛污浊的作弊生世界。“可以说，它发現了我，”他说。
The cheating ring was here to help and Kester's contact wanted to give him all the information about the most common ways to cheat. The most utilized and easiest way to cheat at Harvard is hiding answers in the bathroom. The cheating ring encouraged Kester to visit the bathroom during tests and take advantage of the answers hidden there, but at the last moment he backed out, afraid to jeopardize his academic career.
作弊俱乐部旨在为作弊者提供帮助，凯斯特的聯系人希望他掌握最常用的作弊手段。最常用、也最简单的办法就是把答案藏在卫生间里。作弊俱乐部鼓励凯斯特考試时借口去卫生间，趁机搞到藏在那里的答案。但在关键时刻，他因担心危及自己的学业而退缩了。
Kester admits in the book's Note From the Author that he wrote this book to impress a girl and to impress all of his classmates who went on to big business jobs after graduation—even though he just moved home to live with his parents.
凯斯特在该书的《编者按》中坦承，虽然他现在又搬回了父母的家跟他们住在一起，但他还是希望借这本书能给一个女孩和毕業后为大企业工作的所有同学留下深刻印象。
He also hopes readers understand that there are good people at Harvard, many of whom made his tumultuous college career worth it. Kester, now 26, currently teaches at Middlesex School outside of Boston.
他同时希望讀者們明白，哈佛还是有优秀学生，他们中许多人沒有在喧嚣的大学生活中虚度年华。现年26歲的凯斯特目前在波士顿城郊的米德尔塞克斯学校任教。
"I understand this isn't the Harvard everyone experienced," Kester said. "But I hope anyone reading the book, someone going into college, or an alumnus, can relate to the anxieties we all have about college."
“我知道，这不是大家眼中的哈佛，” 凱斯特说，“但我希望，读這本书的每個人、即将踏入大学校门的學子或毕业生，都能够认同我们大家都有所體会的大学焦虑。”